I had my private vocal lesson yesterday.
It was just amazing. Or I felt like I was doing a meditation or Zen training although I'm not a specialist for Buddhism.
One of my problems is inconsistent pitch. I found that when I was ready with every aspect, my pitch became consistent. In another word, when I was not ready even with one thing necessary, my voice would not work well. Relaxing my jaw, breathing deeply, making a room behind my head, not making a vowel but just feeling it, then the sound comes out so naturally. It was exactly what I wanted to do for years and years but I couldn't reach the line yet.
My teacher gave me a lot of suggestions with detailed explanation. I couldn't respond her instruction and I felt so useless but it was the first lesson, it was just a start. I'll work hard and want to improve my voice by this great opportunity.
When it was finished, my brain was reached the limit, not working any more! I had to very much concentrate all the time. Yet, on my way to the station, many things went around in my brain. I was afraid of the things disappearing so I dropped in the doughnut shop and just try to write down what I learned with a corn bread and coffee.
For me, singing is still full of mystery. I feel often uncomfortable when I sing and think something must be wrong but cannot fix it. I've heard that vocal cord is uncontrollable muscle but you can train it by teaching how to work correctly. When it learns how to work, it remembers the process and will work well from there on, which means if you train it wrongly, it would remember the wrong way and it'd be difficult to change it from the bad to the good. I think my vocal cord muscle learned somehow wrongly and has been doing it for a long time so it'd be difficult to retrain it. But I really want to let it learn the correct way!
Today, I practiced by myself as I remembered the teacher's instruction. It's really difficult!!! I can't do it!!! No more!!!! I just can't do it! I repeat whine.... in my mind. But somehow, partly, a little bit, I could feel comfortable with singing. Just a baby step. I believe I can do it someday! I just started doing it. It's OK for today.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Monday, September 22, 2008
C4 retreat
I joined the choir retreat this weekend. It was a great time for not only music but also for knowing each other, having a peaceful time in a rustic place, cooking hamburgers and hotdogs on the outside grill, walking around and finding pretty flowers and mushrooms...... I had a wonderful time there! I have uploaded more photos on my flickr page so please click this photo and see other photos as well!
Sunday, September 14, 2008
My music life in NY
I came here to work as a volunteer at a nursing home. I never expected I could have such a wonderful musical life during my stay in NY. Before summer, I joined two workshops with The Western Wind. I met excellent musicians there. They brought me other music opportunity.
I had two auditions and passed both of them. So I started to join two choirs from this fall.
One is The C4 Chamber Choir. I met several members at the first Smith Workshop and they asked me to join them. The audition was extremely difficult so I thought I failed it. I was surprised when I got an invitation from them. I'm joining two concerts for this season, in November and February. All pieces are composed by living composers. All are challenging for me. I have to work hard to catch up with them. The next concert's theme is "War and Peace". I want to do my best to make it best! The rehearsal is on Thursday.
Another choir is The Columbia Collegium Musicum. A singer who I met the second Smith workshop asked me to join. The members are mostly students of Columbia University. We are singing Schutz for the next concert in November. The conductor is a young and talented woman. It's a great opportunity for me to sing with young people there. The rehearsal is on Monday and Wednesday.
Other than these, I've been joining a sight singing group on Friday. On weekend, I enjoy singing among church choir. At the nursing home, I play the piano and sing at the chapel service and the Bible study, also I'm starting my own music activity this month.
My life here became not only about communicating with elderly people but also enjoying such a fruitful music life!
I had two auditions and passed both of them. So I started to join two choirs from this fall.
One is The C4 Chamber Choir. I met several members at the first Smith Workshop and they asked me to join them. The audition was extremely difficult so I thought I failed it. I was surprised when I got an invitation from them. I'm joining two concerts for this season, in November and February. All pieces are composed by living composers. All are challenging for me. I have to work hard to catch up with them. The next concert's theme is "War and Peace". I want to do my best to make it best! The rehearsal is on Thursday.
Another choir is The Columbia Collegium Musicum. A singer who I met the second Smith workshop asked me to join. The members are mostly students of Columbia University. We are singing Schutz for the next concert in November. The conductor is a young and talented woman. It's a great opportunity for me to sing with young people there. The rehearsal is on Monday and Wednesday.
Other than these, I've been joining a sight singing group on Friday. On weekend, I enjoy singing among church choir. At the nursing home, I play the piano and sing at the chapel service and the Bible study, also I'm starting my own music activity this month.
My life here became not only about communicating with elderly people but also enjoying such a fruitful music life!
Meeting good people
I met good people on Friday.
In the morning, I had an interview with a head teacher of a school for special kids. She wants volunteers to help her research there. I'm interested in speech pathology so I asked her if I could help her. Unfortunately, our conditions didn't meet well. It takes one and a half hour for me to get there. Also, I need to pay $100 to check criminal records for my finger prints. And I can't get any necessary cost, including transportation fee or meals. She understood my condition and offer me to keep in touch with her and I might help her at home, such as researching good educational materials on the net or at the library and telling her. She explained their excellent education system to me using her past presentation materials. She was energetic, enthusiasm, and very sharp person. I was so glad meeting her.
After the interview, I got on B35 bus from Remsen Ave to Church Av. and Nostrand Av. Taking bus is always difficult for me. I can't catch what the driver's is saying and misses my stop often! This time I got off a few stops earlier. I got off where I thought it was my stop. I couldn't find the subway station. Got lost. I found another bus stop and asked a young woman where the subway station was. She said, "Take the but to get there or walk about 5 blocks." I said, "I just got off the bus now so I think I'll walk. Could you tell me the direction?" She said, "OK we walk!" I was so surprised. I said, "Are you walking with me?" She, "Yes, it's a good exercise! The bus might not come until we get to the station. So we can walk!"
We enjoyed walking together. I talked to her about the interview. She talked to me that she is working for an alternate high school. I told her that I just started to read a YA novel about a boy who is back from reformatory institution to high school life under a supervision. I felt so happy meeting a nice person like her after a tense time at the interview. We exchanged e-mail addresses and promised e-mailing to each other.
What a wonderful time walking with someone who I met just a minute ago!
Then I went to a Salvation Army Store in upper west side, Manhattan to get some warm clothes for the coming winter. I'm joining a choir retreat next weekend so I needed warm relaxing wear until then. My current sleeping wear is short-sleeve T-shirts and shorts. It would be not enough at an up-state place.
The labels on the clothes were varied in colors. The add on the wall said, "50% off for the pink labels!" So I looked for clothes with pink labels and found good ones! Off course, I got 50 % discount for all!
Here are what I got there.
form the left: warm pants for $3.5, a purple sweater for $2, three colored trainer for $2, black fleece full zip jacket for $3.5, and beige fleece blanket for $1.99.
A shop person was nice. He was joking around, saying, "it's $100!" or "You can't get any discount for these!" or something. He made me laugh. I told him I'm working as a volunteer so have no income and I'm really serious about this shopping. His attitude changed and stopped joking around. We had a good chat at the register and said good-bye in a very good mood in the end!
Meeting good people always makes me happy!!!
In the morning, I had an interview with a head teacher of a school for special kids. She wants volunteers to help her research there. I'm interested in speech pathology so I asked her if I could help her. Unfortunately, our conditions didn't meet well. It takes one and a half hour for me to get there. Also, I need to pay $100 to check criminal records for my finger prints. And I can't get any necessary cost, including transportation fee or meals. She understood my condition and offer me to keep in touch with her and I might help her at home, such as researching good educational materials on the net or at the library and telling her. She explained their excellent education system to me using her past presentation materials. She was energetic, enthusiasm, and very sharp person. I was so glad meeting her.
After the interview, I got on B35 bus from Remsen Ave to Church Av. and Nostrand Av. Taking bus is always difficult for me. I can't catch what the driver's is saying and misses my stop often! This time I got off a few stops earlier. I got off where I thought it was my stop. I couldn't find the subway station. Got lost. I found another bus stop and asked a young woman where the subway station was. She said, "Take the but to get there or walk about 5 blocks." I said, "I just got off the bus now so I think I'll walk. Could you tell me the direction?" She said, "OK we walk!" I was so surprised. I said, "Are you walking with me?" She, "Yes, it's a good exercise! The bus might not come until we get to the station. So we can walk!"
We enjoyed walking together. I talked to her about the interview. She talked to me that she is working for an alternate high school. I told her that I just started to read a YA novel about a boy who is back from reformatory institution to high school life under a supervision. I felt so happy meeting a nice person like her after a tense time at the interview. We exchanged e-mail addresses and promised e-mailing to each other.
What a wonderful time walking with someone who I met just a minute ago!
Then I went to a Salvation Army Store in upper west side, Manhattan to get some warm clothes for the coming winter. I'm joining a choir retreat next weekend so I needed warm relaxing wear until then. My current sleeping wear is short-sleeve T-shirts and shorts. It would be not enough at an up-state place.
The labels on the clothes were varied in colors. The add on the wall said, "50% off for the pink labels!" So I looked for clothes with pink labels and found good ones! Off course, I got 50 % discount for all!
Here are what I got there.
form the left: warm pants for $3.5, a purple sweater for $2, three colored trainer for $2, black fleece full zip jacket for $3.5, and beige fleece blanket for $1.99.
A shop person was nice. He was joking around, saying, "it's $100!" or "You can't get any discount for these!" or something. He made me laugh. I told him I'm working as a volunteer so have no income and I'm really serious about this shopping. His attitude changed and stopped joking around. We had a good chat at the register and said good-bye in a very good mood in the end!
Meeting good people always makes me happy!!!
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
tears and a funeral service
I attended a funeral service last Thursday. It was different from what I've seen before. There were just two of us, Ieva and me, and the dead resident. He died the previous week at the age of 63. We couldn't find any of his relatives to contact with. Last Wednesday, Ieva asked me if I could do the service with her. She said if we didn't do it, then there would be no service at all. I said yes right away.
Thursday morning, we met at the funeral hall at 10:30. Then we were led to a basement room. There were two sofas, two chairs, a small table and his body in a coffin. That was all. We sat there to waited till the scheduled time came, 11:00. Meanwhile, Ieva went out of the room twice to make phone calls to our nursing home to confirm if anybody else would attend or not, 5 minutes or so for each time. During then, I was just alone with the body. When I was a child, I was scared of dead bodies terribly. I hated ghosts stories, haunted houses at amusement parks, being alone in my room at dark.... This time, to my surprise, I was not scared at all, rather I felt peaceful. He was there still. He didn't move, looked like just sleeping. I thought he might have awake soon after taking a nap or so. I felt calm.
At 11:00, we started the service by just two of us. We stand beside the coffin. Ieva started to read the funeral prayer from the Hymn book. We sang a Hymn "Be Still My Soul" together. Ieva stared to read another prayer. I noticed her voice was changing little by little to nasal tone, and weakened. Then I knew she was crying. She couldn't finish the prayer so I read the last line and we said "Amen" at the end together.
I remember Ieva once told me that she can't cry before people. It was just before she got officially retired from the job this June. At that time, as we were walking along the hallway, lots of staff and residents came up to her and gave her sweet comments and hugged her tightly. I was impressed to see the beautiful scenes. And I'm sure she was impressed by everybody's sweet comment, too. Ieva told me that she felt like crying, even got choked up, but no tear comes out. I know you could get rid of a choke-up by crying. Tears wash away your chock-up somehow, even partly. I understood her mind and felt sorry for her.
So I was a bit surprised to sense her crying during the funeral service, at the same time, I was somehow glad with it. I don't know why. Maybe I thought that she could cry before me because we built up our good friendship. I might be wrong but I felt so and somehow glad with it.
Then I sang a Hymn "O Jesus, I Have Promised" solo just for the dead resident. I chose it and practiced it at home the previous night, remembering his smile. As I was singing, I hoped his peaceful life without any pain in the heaven with God.
I felt warm although the body was real cold when I touched him at the end of the service.
We had a good time with him. I thank him to let us have a good peaceful time altogether.
Thursday morning, we met at the funeral hall at 10:30. Then we were led to a basement room. There were two sofas, two chairs, a small table and his body in a coffin. That was all. We sat there to waited till the scheduled time came, 11:00. Meanwhile, Ieva went out of the room twice to make phone calls to our nursing home to confirm if anybody else would attend or not, 5 minutes or so for each time. During then, I was just alone with the body. When I was a child, I was scared of dead bodies terribly. I hated ghosts stories, haunted houses at amusement parks, being alone in my room at dark.... This time, to my surprise, I was not scared at all, rather I felt peaceful. He was there still. He didn't move, looked like just sleeping. I thought he might have awake soon after taking a nap or so. I felt calm.
At 11:00, we started the service by just two of us. We stand beside the coffin. Ieva started to read the funeral prayer from the Hymn book. We sang a Hymn "Be Still My Soul" together. Ieva stared to read another prayer. I noticed her voice was changing little by little to nasal tone, and weakened. Then I knew she was crying. She couldn't finish the prayer so I read the last line and we said "Amen" at the end together.
I remember Ieva once told me that she can't cry before people. It was just before she got officially retired from the job this June. At that time, as we were walking along the hallway, lots of staff and residents came up to her and gave her sweet comments and hugged her tightly. I was impressed to see the beautiful scenes. And I'm sure she was impressed by everybody's sweet comment, too. Ieva told me that she felt like crying, even got choked up, but no tear comes out. I know you could get rid of a choke-up by crying. Tears wash away your chock-up somehow, even partly. I understood her mind and felt sorry for her.
So I was a bit surprised to sense her crying during the funeral service, at the same time, I was somehow glad with it. I don't know why. Maybe I thought that she could cry before me because we built up our good friendship. I might be wrong but I felt so and somehow glad with it.
Then I sang a Hymn "O Jesus, I Have Promised" solo just for the dead resident. I chose it and practiced it at home the previous night, remembering his smile. As I was singing, I hoped his peaceful life without any pain in the heaven with God.
I felt warm although the body was real cold when I touched him at the end of the service.
We had a good time with him. I thank him to let us have a good peaceful time altogether.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
the-end-of-summer weekend!
I had a wonderful time on Labor Day weekend.
On Sunday, I went to the beach with my friends. It was my first time to go to the beach in the past 15 years or so. The weather was perfect. The dark blue Atlantic Ocean and the bright blue sky welcomed us as well as seaguls!
And then we drove to the Howard Beach, where we found an Italian retaurant for dinner. I had calamari pasta with hot sauce. I loved it! We were already full when the dessert was served. I can't believe it but we bobbled it up!!
On Saturday, I saw the West Indian Day Parade in Brooklyn! It was fabulous! I'll show you some of the photos here and if you like, you can visit my flickr page where you can see more photos!
I saw San. Chuck Schumer there!
Thursday, August 28, 2008
interaction type and speech type
I thought Bill Clinton is an interaction type. Hillary is a speech type. They are different. When it comes to making a speech, Hillary's voice sounds great. When it comes to interacting, Bill can make people comfortable and feel trustful. They are different, I thought.
Now, John Kerry started to speak!
Now, John Kerry started to speak!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Hillary's speech
I happened to see Hillary's speech tonight and was so impressed with it. After the bitter defeat, I was interested to see how she pull herself together. She was beautiful, first of all. Her eyes were shining. She seemed full of confidence. Her language, of which I could understand every word, which means, I believe, every American including lots of immigrants who don't speak English well could understand what she said. It was very persuasive. Even I, who is not an American citizen, was almost moved to tears as one of the women in the world, felt sympathy for what she was saying. Then the question raised to my mind that it might have been a mistake not to choose Hillary as a presidential candidate or not....
Now, I'm very much interested in what Obama talks about in his speech, maybe Thursday night? He must leave a stronger impression than Hillary. It must be a tremendously difficult job!!
Now, I'm very much interested in what Obama talks about in his speech, maybe Thursday night? He must leave a stronger impression than Hillary. It must be a tremendously difficult job!!
Saturday, August 23, 2008
conversation and life
When you feel strong, you feel like you want to have a conversation with someone. For me, "Strong" can be "happy", "positive", "motivated", or "remembering loves towards people around you". To have a further converstaion, you might need to reveal your weakness sometimes.
This week, I had two conversations which now remain in my deep mind.
On Tuesday, I visited Mr. D's room before lunch time. He always stays in his room. He watches TV almost always. He seems to like being alone. I have rarely seen him in the day-room. I had talked with him several times before, but never had a deep conversation. I don't remember how it went but we started to talk about the time when we lose our motivation. Maybe I asked him how his physical therapy was going, he said it was going fine but not significant. And I remembered that I lost my energy to walk to the second closest subway station, which is only 15-minute walking distance from my place, after a few weeks of the workshop. I started to regain my energy just last weekend or so. This Tuesday morning, I realized that my feet moved forward by themselves and I felt like walking even to the next station of the second closest station. I talked about my story to him, and confessed, that I couldn't feel like talking to anyone after the workshop because I was too tired, I even shut the office door for a few hours even when I was back at the Home, then now I regained my energy both physically and mentally so I have a conversation with him and was so glad with it.
He started to talk about his weakness, saying, "I understand, I understand...." . He used to live with his elder sister, just two of them. He was told that he muscle was getting weakened and needed to be hospitalized. It was last year. He was so shocked to hear that. But he believed he could came back and lived with his sister again. He was hospitalized and moved to this Home a few months ago. I don't know his physical condition in details. I can tell his muscle is weak because he can't walk well and can't speak clearly. He spoke slowly but it actually helped me to understand his words. His slowness made me somehow secure. I could ask him to say the words again when I couldn't catch his words. He continued. His sister visits him often and express her loneliness. She wants him to come home soon. Yes, he wants to come home, too. He said he sometimes can't be positive. He sometimes loses energy to walk, to try hard. His eyes got filled with fluids..... It made me sad. I said, "I can understand your mind, a little bit....." I really hope his condition becomes better and live with his sister again as soon as possible. I said
We need to be healthy both physically and mentally to live positively.
On Thursday's lunch time, I made a round each table at the main dining room as usual. Most of the conversation was just greeting, saying "How are you today?" "I'm find and you?" "I'm fine, too" "Take care!", "It's a beautiful day today!" or something like that. I would make a longer conversation to several people who are willing to talk .
This time, I want to write about Ms. F. When I saw her first time, she seemed so weak. Her back was bended. She often coughed and can't digest food well. After lunch, she prefer going outside, to the Patio, and enjoy the sunshine. or if it's too hot or cold, she is at the hallway, in front of the elevators, and see people passing by. I usually say to her, "Hello, how are you?" shaking her hand. First time, I was surprised to see her grip strength is so strong! We shake our hands and exchange greetings, that's all, most of the times. One day, maybe around two months ago, when we have a cold meal, she said, "I am a German, so I don't eat a cold meal." It was the longest words I had ever heard she spoke at that time.
I remember, this Tuesday when I greeted her, she said, "you were not here yesterday, you are a bad girl!" I said, "Yes, I took a day off yesterday, I'm sorry, yes I'm a bad girl!"
Next day, Wednesday, I said, "Hi, I'm here! I'm a good girl today, right? Tell me I'm a good girl!" She said, "yes, you are a good girl!" I was glad we had a good daily phrase to exchange.
Then Thursday, after saying a "you are a good girl!" phrase, she started to talk. Our conversation went like this:
"I'm tired."
"Why?"
"I'm too old"
"No, you are not too old. You have much times left in your life!"
"No, I'm 93 years old. Too old. I'm tired to live."
"Don't say that. I'm glad you are here. You are here to make people happy because I feel happy you are here."
"My grandfather died 81 years old. I'm too old. I don't want to live any more. I lived too long. I'm tired."
"Oh, you overlived your grand father. You should be proud of yourself! I know people here who are elder than you. I think you are not the eldest here. And listen, if you had passed away, let's say a few years ago, we could haven't met each other. It's sad. I'm so glad we could meet each other. "
She smiled silently. She wanted to tell something to me. I was glad she talked to me about her deep feeling. Now, I want to know her life. Where she was born? What was her childhood like? What was her young hood like? I want to talk with her more. I want to know her 93-year-long life more.
I realized that, in my daily life at the Home, I make a longer conversation with certain people. With other people, I tend to exchange just greetings. I want to expand the possibility to have a longer conversation with more people. I shouldn't give up.
For the past week, we lost two women who regularly come to the Adult Day Health Care Center. We are going to have a memorial service for them next Tuesday. Also we lost other two residents who lived at the nursing home. One of them, Mr. C had no family, Ieva told me that. We visited him at the hospital in June. He seemed small at the time but his voice was strong enough to shout out to complain that people were not kind enough to him or he really wanted to come to the Home. He was joking around. He said he could teach me a "good" English. I asked him to teach me. At first, I thought he is a scary person, but my impression changed after we talked together for a while. He was a good person. I felt sad when I heard his death. I want to attend his funeral, maybe some day next week.
Our life is limited. We can't do everything. Sometimes you feel a life is too short, some times you might feel it's too long, because it's unpredictable, it's a mystery somehow. I don't know what to explain but mixed feelings going around in my mind this week.
This week, I had two conversations which now remain in my deep mind.
On Tuesday, I visited Mr. D's room before lunch time. He always stays in his room. He watches TV almost always. He seems to like being alone. I have rarely seen him in the day-room. I had talked with him several times before, but never had a deep conversation. I don't remember how it went but we started to talk about the time when we lose our motivation. Maybe I asked him how his physical therapy was going, he said it was going fine but not significant. And I remembered that I lost my energy to walk to the second closest subway station, which is only 15-minute walking distance from my place, after a few weeks of the workshop. I started to regain my energy just last weekend or so. This Tuesday morning, I realized that my feet moved forward by themselves and I felt like walking even to the next station of the second closest station. I talked about my story to him, and confessed, that I couldn't feel like talking to anyone after the workshop because I was too tired, I even shut the office door for a few hours even when I was back at the Home, then now I regained my energy both physically and mentally so I have a conversation with him and was so glad with it.
He started to talk about his weakness, saying, "I understand, I understand...." . He used to live with his elder sister, just two of them. He was told that he muscle was getting weakened and needed to be hospitalized. It was last year. He was so shocked to hear that. But he believed he could came back and lived with his sister again. He was hospitalized and moved to this Home a few months ago. I don't know his physical condition in details. I can tell his muscle is weak because he can't walk well and can't speak clearly. He spoke slowly but it actually helped me to understand his words. His slowness made me somehow secure. I could ask him to say the words again when I couldn't catch his words. He continued. His sister visits him often and express her loneliness. She wants him to come home soon. Yes, he wants to come home, too. He said he sometimes can't be positive. He sometimes loses energy to walk, to try hard. His eyes got filled with fluids..... It made me sad. I said, "I can understand your mind, a little bit....." I really hope his condition becomes better and live with his sister again as soon as possible. I said
We need to be healthy both physically and mentally to live positively.
On Thursday's lunch time, I made a round each table at the main dining room as usual. Most of the conversation was just greeting, saying "How are you today?" "I'm find and you?" "I'm fine, too" "Take care!", "It's a beautiful day today!" or something like that. I would make a longer conversation to several people who are willing to talk .
This time, I want to write about Ms. F. When I saw her first time, she seemed so weak. Her back was bended. She often coughed and can't digest food well. After lunch, she prefer going outside, to the Patio, and enjoy the sunshine. or if it's too hot or cold, she is at the hallway, in front of the elevators, and see people passing by. I usually say to her, "Hello, how are you?" shaking her hand. First time, I was surprised to see her grip strength is so strong! We shake our hands and exchange greetings, that's all, most of the times. One day, maybe around two months ago, when we have a cold meal, she said, "I am a German, so I don't eat a cold meal." It was the longest words I had ever heard she spoke at that time.
I remember, this Tuesday when I greeted her, she said, "you were not here yesterday, you are a bad girl!" I said, "Yes, I took a day off yesterday, I'm sorry, yes I'm a bad girl!"
Next day, Wednesday, I said, "Hi, I'm here! I'm a good girl today, right? Tell me I'm a good girl!" She said, "yes, you are a good girl!" I was glad we had a good daily phrase to exchange.
Then Thursday, after saying a "you are a good girl!" phrase, she started to talk. Our conversation went like this:
"I'm tired."
"Why?"
"I'm too old"
"No, you are not too old. You have much times left in your life!"
"No, I'm 93 years old. Too old. I'm tired to live."
"Don't say that. I'm glad you are here. You are here to make people happy because I feel happy you are here."
"My grandfather died 81 years old. I'm too old. I don't want to live any more. I lived too long. I'm tired."
"Oh, you overlived your grand father. You should be proud of yourself! I know people here who are elder than you. I think you are not the eldest here. And listen, if you had passed away, let's say a few years ago, we could haven't met each other. It's sad. I'm so glad we could meet each other. "
She smiled silently. She wanted to tell something to me. I was glad she talked to me about her deep feeling. Now, I want to know her life. Where she was born? What was her childhood like? What was her young hood like? I want to talk with her more. I want to know her 93-year-long life more.
I realized that, in my daily life at the Home, I make a longer conversation with certain people. With other people, I tend to exchange just greetings. I want to expand the possibility to have a longer conversation with more people. I shouldn't give up.
For the past week, we lost two women who regularly come to the Adult Day Health Care Center. We are going to have a memorial service for them next Tuesday. Also we lost other two residents who lived at the nursing home. One of them, Mr. C had no family, Ieva told me that. We visited him at the hospital in June. He seemed small at the time but his voice was strong enough to shout out to complain that people were not kind enough to him or he really wanted to come to the Home. He was joking around. He said he could teach me a "good" English. I asked him to teach me. At first, I thought he is a scary person, but my impression changed after we talked together for a while. He was a good person. I felt sad when I heard his death. I want to attend his funeral, maybe some day next week.
Our life is limited. We can't do everything. Sometimes you feel a life is too short, some times you might feel it's too long, because it's unpredictable, it's a mystery somehow. I don't know what to explain but mixed feelings going around in my mind this week.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
musical "Hair" at the Central Park
I saw the musical "Hair" at the Central Park last night. It was just fabulous!! My friend who I met Brian's radio show's event three years ago asked me to go there together. She went to the park at 7:30 AM to be in a line to get the tickets. She said there were already more than 500 people, 7:30 in the morning! But she found another line for senior citizen over 65, and there were only 8 people in the line! She was there until 1PM when the staff started to give the ticket to the people. We had dinner at her apartment and headed to the Park together. The weather was perfect, not so hot and not so cold, at intermission, we saw the beautiful moon!
Also I was impressed with the beauty of the theater itself, especially the natural lawn on the stage!
In the performance, each singer sang so beautifully and the band played wonderfully. The band's conductor was a woman, a keyboardist! I noticed there was an Asian singer among them, I didn't know her but I felt proud of her as Asians.
I couldn't understand all of the lyrics, but could understand most of the read lines. In the end of it, some of the audience went on to the stage and danced with the performers. It was like a dancing party, not a light-hearted one but a deep-hearted one. Everybody seemed to enjoy it also I felt everybody deeply wish for peace as they were dancing. I was moved as I saw the scene.
I'd never heard of the musical before. Before going there I googled it and learn about it a little bit. My friend told me her sentiment for the Hair. She said this time is the same as the time when the musical had a debut at the Public theater at Lower Manhattan over forty years ago. Now, we still have wars, people are dying everyday. Even military duty is not mandate anymore (I didn't know that!), many people are suffering because sometimes each family member has different idea toward war or military. A son might want to join the military to protect his own country because he thinks that's the best things to do in his life, and the mother might think it's ridiculous. It's happening here. Her words and the musical made me think a lot about what is the meaning of having a military system in your country or what is the meaning of fighting a war now, and so on. Also I thought of why people tempted to use drugs when they became helpless or hopeless, even among intelligent people, among powerful people. Or people in the so called "high-level" might be weaker? I don't know. It's a deep issue.
We don't have a military system in Japan. But several politicians insists we should have one to be independent from the US or for some other reasons. I don't like the idea. But I'm afraid more and more people are getting conservative and patriotic and inclined to this extreme idea...... We won't have peace if we continued to keep guns with us. I don't want to live in such a world where all people keep their guns, even to protect themselves. I don't know how to improve the situation but only to wish for peace.
It might be important for us to just talk with each other, not only between people with same ideas but also people with different ideas, cultures, races, nationalities, to make peace come.
This fall, there will be the presidential election here in the US. Personally, I want to see the first black President in the history. I'm very much interested in the result. It will definitely affect the relationship between my country and the US.
Also I was impressed with the beauty of the theater itself, especially the natural lawn on the stage!
In the performance, each singer sang so beautifully and the band played wonderfully. The band's conductor was a woman, a keyboardist! I noticed there was an Asian singer among them, I didn't know her but I felt proud of her as Asians.
I couldn't understand all of the lyrics, but could understand most of the read lines. In the end of it, some of the audience went on to the stage and danced with the performers. It was like a dancing party, not a light-hearted one but a deep-hearted one. Everybody seemed to enjoy it also I felt everybody deeply wish for peace as they were dancing. I was moved as I saw the scene.
I'd never heard of the musical before. Before going there I googled it and learn about it a little bit. My friend told me her sentiment for the Hair. She said this time is the same as the time when the musical had a debut at the Public theater at Lower Manhattan over forty years ago. Now, we still have wars, people are dying everyday. Even military duty is not mandate anymore (I didn't know that!), many people are suffering because sometimes each family member has different idea toward war or military. A son might want to join the military to protect his own country because he thinks that's the best things to do in his life, and the mother might think it's ridiculous. It's happening here. Her words and the musical made me think a lot about what is the meaning of having a military system in your country or what is the meaning of fighting a war now, and so on. Also I thought of why people tempted to use drugs when they became helpless or hopeless, even among intelligent people, among powerful people. Or people in the so called "high-level" might be weaker? I don't know. It's a deep issue.
We don't have a military system in Japan. But several politicians insists we should have one to be independent from the US or for some other reasons. I don't like the idea. But I'm afraid more and more people are getting conservative and patriotic and inclined to this extreme idea...... We won't have peace if we continued to keep guns with us. I don't want to live in such a world where all people keep their guns, even to protect themselves. I don't know how to improve the situation but only to wish for peace.
It might be important for us to just talk with each other, not only between people with same ideas but also people with different ideas, cultures, races, nationalities, to make peace come.
This fall, there will be the presidential election here in the US. Personally, I want to see the first black President in the history. I'm very much interested in the result. It will definitely affect the relationship between my country and the US.
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