I didn't have lunch today because I was sleeping for a few hours in the afternoon. Maybe it was a too long nap! I woke up and lay down on the bed for 30 more minutes, and wash my face to go for dinner.
I asked the kitchen staff who remembered me for her name because I wanted to remember her name, too!
I met a lot of new people there. I very much enjoyed conversation with some of them. They told me about their past experiences to me. I knew everybody had a tough time and more than once thought about that they would never come back. But at least they came back! Why? The answer would be obvious. This workshop gives you something special. You could learn not only music but various things about life. I was impressed with every one's story and was encouraged. I shouldn't worry about things. I should not be so serious. Of course I should work hard to make the most of my time here. Then I should be satisfied what I or we would be done.
Oh, my another happiness is that there are four Japanese people in this five-day course, including me. Yumiko is one of the faculty member. She brought her Japanese student. Also I met Keiko from Tokyo. Since I joined the last workshop, everybody told me about Keiko. All of them expressed how wonderful she is. I was so glad to meet Keiko tonight! It's going to be a wonderful time this week!
OK, I'm having a happy dream tonight!
Good night from Smith II.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
a joy
I forgot to write about a joy I had on Saturday. When I went to have dinner to the dining hall, I greeted to the kitchen staff. To my surprise, she called my name and said, "Welcome back Naoko!" I was delightful to hear that!
a day off beween two courses
It's Monday. Most of the weekend course participants left yesterday right after the concert, and the five-day course people are coming this evening.
I wrote, "I've been very much enjoying time here." in the last entry. Did I enjoy the time here for the weekend? Honestly, I'm not so sure about it. I don't know why. I tried to enjoy it, and couldn't do it fully, and tried it and couldn't...... I can't explain the reason why. In some sense, I have a feeling of that I couldn't adjust myself to everyone, I'm not sure if I did OK, or I'm not so sure about ...... everything. This time, I could only sometimes feel my voice was mixed with everyone, I couldn't feel good quality of harmony, and then felt I was the one who made it worse.... or I often felt I couldn't play my role well. On the whole, we did our best at the concert, I believe. But for me, I couldn't do my nest at the concert, also I couldn't do my best at our rehearsals.
However, looking back the weekend at the last workshop, I was feeling more insecure. Yes, I stopped the music several times at the concert! It was better this time. Maybe so. Then, the last time, I felt so happy in the end of the five day course. So I believe I'm going to be all right in the end this time. I hope so.
One of my friends, who I met at the last workshop, told me that it needed to be challenging for us to grow up and learn. I'm not sure if I could grow up through this past weekend..... I'll see in the end of this coming weekend. It's really challenging in various respects.
Oh, I want write about one more thing, I was so impressed with other groups' performances, which made me think a lot. What is the great point of someone being able to sightread? Maybe it's convenient for someone who love music to have a sight-reading skill. But it must not decide how musically great the person is. I saw lots of wonderful singers at this workshop as well as the last one. Singers with dramatic voices, beautiful voices, crystal clear voices, resonant voices, excellent expressions, excellent sense of rhythms, and so on. Also I was so impressed with their great improvement between the Friday seminar and the final concert. That must be the most wonderful thing to witness here. I can imagine how hard each facilitator worked for all of us.
Maybe, I should not worry about myself that much. It's going to be all right!
I wrote, "I've been very much enjoying time here." in the last entry. Did I enjoy the time here for the weekend? Honestly, I'm not so sure about it. I don't know why. I tried to enjoy it, and couldn't do it fully, and tried it and couldn't...... I can't explain the reason why. In some sense, I have a feeling of that I couldn't adjust myself to everyone, I'm not sure if I did OK, or I'm not so sure about ...... everything. This time, I could only sometimes feel my voice was mixed with everyone, I couldn't feel good quality of harmony, and then felt I was the one who made it worse.... or I often felt I couldn't play my role well. On the whole, we did our best at the concert, I believe. But for me, I couldn't do my nest at the concert, also I couldn't do my best at our rehearsals.
However, looking back the weekend at the last workshop, I was feeling more insecure. Yes, I stopped the music several times at the concert! It was better this time. Maybe so. Then, the last time, I felt so happy in the end of the five day course. So I believe I'm going to be all right in the end this time. I hope so.
One of my friends, who I met at the last workshop, told me that it needed to be challenging for us to grow up and learn. I'm not sure if I could grow up through this past weekend..... I'll see in the end of this coming weekend. It's really challenging in various respects.
Oh, I want write about one more thing, I was so impressed with other groups' performances, which made me think a lot. What is the great point of someone being able to sightread? Maybe it's convenient for someone who love music to have a sight-reading skill. But it must not decide how musically great the person is. I saw lots of wonderful singers at this workshop as well as the last one. Singers with dramatic voices, beautiful voices, crystal clear voices, resonant voices, excellent expressions, excellent sense of rhythms, and so on. Also I was so impressed with their great improvement between the Friday seminar and the final concert. That must be the most wonderful thing to witness here. I can imagine how hard each facilitator worked for all of us.
Maybe, I should not worry about myself that much. It's going to be all right!
Sunday, July 27, 2008
There are 10 singers in my group!
The last time's weekend, there were only 4 singers on Saturday and 3 singers on Sunday. This time, we have 10 singers in my group. I've been learning lots of different things from this experience. It's sometimes difficult to communicate with others not only in a language way, but a musical way. Fundamental things, such as, how to start the piece, should have somebody who gives us cue, how to slow down, how to speed up, how to keep the tempo, how to interact with people who sing with different rhythms......
At first, everybody tended to concentrate only on their own note, absolutely including me! Then gradually, we got used to it and had an extra time to look at each other's faces. On the stage, I think we did the best performance with the last song. I felt so happy!
In tomorrow's final concert for the weekend course, we will sing Monteverdi's work with the lute and the cembalo. We rehearsed the piece today. I loved it so I want to make it better tomorrow. Have to work on it next morning, before the program starts!
I've been very much enjoying time here!
Good night, everyone!
At first, everybody tended to concentrate only on their own note, absolutely including me! Then gradually, we got used to it and had an extra time to look at each other's faces. On the stage, I think we did the best performance with the last song. I felt so happy!
In tomorrow's final concert for the weekend course, we will sing Monteverdi's work with the lute and the cembalo. We rehearsed the piece today. I loved it so I want to make it better tomorrow. Have to work on it next morning, before the program starts!
I've been very much enjoying time here!
Good night, everyone!
Saturday, July 26, 2008
hello from Smith college again!
I'm in the dorm room at Smith College in Massachusetts!! There seems to be a lot more people joining this second Smith workshop by The Western Wind. I'm looking forward to meeting wonderful musical people here!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Everybody's Amazing Story.
We had Bible study at the adult day health care center.
A volunteer pastor was supposed to show up but was not there on time. So I just started to sing Amazing Grace with the participants while we were waiting for the pastor. Then, something came up to my mind. I started to talk to them, "I love this song! And I want to hear your amazing stories today. Let me tell you my amazing story. My amazing story is being here! When I started to think about being a volunteer in foreign country, I had no idea to make it realized. I just told my thought to my husband. After getting his approval, I e-mailed my friend in Brooklyn, whom I met three years ago when I stay there for three months to learn English. She is pastor Ieva's friend! Also they were going to get together the next day. Over lunch, they talked about me and decided to have me here! Isn't it amazing?" They listened to my story enthusiastically. I was glad to share my story with them.
My piano student talked about her story, one time she was very sick and the doctor told her she might have died. But at midnight, she somehow survived miraculously!
One woman talked about her son. Soon after his birth, he got sick. All family gave up him but her. She took her son to NY from their state (down south). He had an operation and saved! She said, "God is a doctor of doctors." I liked the expression.
Then the volunteer pastor called the staff and left a message that she could not come and we could learn Psalm 91.
I asked people to do a opening prayer. A woman raised her hand. I had never heard her pray. To my great joy, she prayed soooooo beautifully, which made a staff said, "It was beautiful!"
Then a woman in a wheel chair raised her hand and told us how thankful she is to God. I remember once she told us her story. She loves singing. She had a dream one night, where her singing voice went up and up to high to the heaven to God. She said she is thankful to God that he gave her her voice to sing even though she can't walk. Yesterday, she led a song for us. She requested a song and I said "is it included in our song book?" She said no. Then I asked her "then you can lead us to sing!" She said, "Everybody knows the song!" I said, "But we need you to lead us! Please do it!" I handed the microphone to her and she led us beautifully.
My piano student read the Bible, Psalm 91 for us and explained the meaning. I really appreciated her help. I couldn't do it without her help.
For the closing prayer, I asked a woman to do it. I remember she told us her beautiful story one time. She once wanted to die but rethought about it and then reached the idea, she could help people and she could go on her life, to be needed. I loved her idea and I wanted her to pray. She hesitated a little bit at first but did it at last! I was really glad to hear her prayer.
It turned out to be a good time. I know God helped me to do it. He let me do it.
Thank you.
It's been really tough these days at the nursing home. I don't know what I should do and what I don't have to. I think I'm here to communicate with people. But at the same time, to join the religious activities became an important part of my job, too, because people look forward to participate the activities. It's really hard to make a good balance between everything, not only things but also people.
A volunteer pastor was supposed to show up but was not there on time. So I just started to sing Amazing Grace with the participants while we were waiting for the pastor. Then, something came up to my mind. I started to talk to them, "I love this song! And I want to hear your amazing stories today. Let me tell you my amazing story. My amazing story is being here! When I started to think about being a volunteer in foreign country, I had no idea to make it realized. I just told my thought to my husband. After getting his approval, I e-mailed my friend in Brooklyn, whom I met three years ago when I stay there for three months to learn English. She is pastor Ieva's friend! Also they were going to get together the next day. Over lunch, they talked about me and decided to have me here! Isn't it amazing?" They listened to my story enthusiastically. I was glad to share my story with them.
My piano student talked about her story, one time she was very sick and the doctor told her she might have died. But at midnight, she somehow survived miraculously!
One woman talked about her son. Soon after his birth, he got sick. All family gave up him but her. She took her son to NY from their state (down south). He had an operation and saved! She said, "God is a doctor of doctors." I liked the expression.
Then the volunteer pastor called the staff and left a message that she could not come and we could learn Psalm 91.
I asked people to do a opening prayer. A woman raised her hand. I had never heard her pray. To my great joy, she prayed soooooo beautifully, which made a staff said, "It was beautiful!"
Then a woman in a wheel chair raised her hand and told us how thankful she is to God. I remember once she told us her story. She loves singing. She had a dream one night, where her singing voice went up and up to high to the heaven to God. She said she is thankful to God that he gave her her voice to sing even though she can't walk. Yesterday, she led a song for us. She requested a song and I said "is it included in our song book?" She said no. Then I asked her "then you can lead us to sing!" She said, "Everybody knows the song!" I said, "But we need you to lead us! Please do it!" I handed the microphone to her and she led us beautifully.
My piano student read the Bible, Psalm 91 for us and explained the meaning. I really appreciated her help. I couldn't do it without her help.
For the closing prayer, I asked a woman to do it. I remember she told us her beautiful story one time. She once wanted to die but rethought about it and then reached the idea, she could help people and she could go on her life, to be needed. I loved her idea and I wanted her to pray. She hesitated a little bit at first but did it at last! I was really glad to hear her prayer.
It turned out to be a good time. I know God helped me to do it. He let me do it.
Thank you.
It's been really tough these days at the nursing home. I don't know what I should do and what I don't have to. I think I'm here to communicate with people. But at the same time, to join the religious activities became an important part of my job, too, because people look forward to participate the activities. It's really hard to make a good balance between everything, not only things but also people.
Monday, July 21, 2008
I hate the weekend subway!
Yesterday, I had a good time with my friend who is visiting NY from Japan with her parents. We met at the Time Warner Building at Columbus Circle, then had lunch at food court in Whole Foods supermarket. I love the place and I was glad that she loved the place very much! After lunch we took bus to 34th St. then enjoyed shopping at H&M, Conways, Payless shoes, Jack dollar shop, and so on. Although we bought just a few things, we very much enjoyed the time to look around things together.
Actually, I've had sore throat since Friday. So I had a rest Saturday night, not singing, not playing the piano, but just reading a book and doing the imagination training. The imagination training is reading music and playing the small keyboard as I lay down on the bed. For example, I look at the melody with out playing the key, and imagine the note in my brain, then play the key, if I was correct, then look at the next note and imagine the note in my brain and play the key.... like that. I think it helps to improve my sight reading ability. It'd be a good preparation for the next workshop!
This morning, I left home around 7:30 to get church earlier than usual. The women chorus piece's rehearsal was supposed to start 9:15, which was 15 minutes earlier than the whole choir's rehearsal, but I wanted to get there even earlier than that because I was supposed to play two pieces of piano music at the service. Also I was afraid of weekend crazy subway schedule. So I was going to have breakfast near church, I thought, maybe I could arrived there 8:30 or so.
I headed to the A line station first, which took me 10 minutes. There are two stations near my apartments, A line and NO 1 line, No 1 line station is closer but A line is convenient with the connection. I arrived to the A line station and knew, weekend A downtown train skip the station! I headed back to No 1 line station, which took me another ten minutes walk! Then I made two time connection to get my church. When I arrived at the church it was already 9:10! I had no time to have breakfast. I just bought corn bread at nearby deli and had a little of it as I walked to the church or on the train after the service. I felt like being a New Yorker!
As for my piano playing, it went quite well, I believe. I am thankful to be given this opportunity. My fingers were trembling when I started to play the prelude, also my heart was pounding all the time, but I felt so happy to be able to share the music with people I love!
Actually, I've had sore throat since Friday. So I had a rest Saturday night, not singing, not playing the piano, but just reading a book and doing the imagination training. The imagination training is reading music and playing the small keyboard as I lay down on the bed. For example, I look at the melody with out playing the key, and imagine the note in my brain, then play the key, if I was correct, then look at the next note and imagine the note in my brain and play the key.... like that. I think it helps to improve my sight reading ability. It'd be a good preparation for the next workshop!
This morning, I left home around 7:30 to get church earlier than usual. The women chorus piece's rehearsal was supposed to start 9:15, which was 15 minutes earlier than the whole choir's rehearsal, but I wanted to get there even earlier than that because I was supposed to play two pieces of piano music at the service. Also I was afraid of weekend crazy subway schedule. So I was going to have breakfast near church, I thought, maybe I could arrived there 8:30 or so.
I headed to the A line station first, which took me 10 minutes. There are two stations near my apartments, A line and NO 1 line, No 1 line station is closer but A line is convenient with the connection. I arrived to the A line station and knew, weekend A downtown train skip the station! I headed back to No 1 line station, which took me another ten minutes walk! Then I made two time connection to get my church. When I arrived at the church it was already 9:10! I had no time to have breakfast. I just bought corn bread at nearby deli and had a little of it as I walked to the church or on the train after the service. I felt like being a New Yorker!
As for my piano playing, it went quite well, I believe. I am thankful to be given this opportunity. My fingers were trembling when I started to play the prelude, also my heart was pounding all the time, but I felt so happy to be able to share the music with people I love!
Friday, July 18, 2008
bagel and coffee for breakfast
I want to do something different this morning. I left home earlier and sat on a bench at the Central Park West Ave., spent 30 minutes reading a book, then felt hungry remembering I just had orange juice at home. I found a vendor at entrance of the 103rd subway station. It was my first time to buy bagel and hot coffee there. The vendor man was cheerful and kind. He asked me if I am Chinese, a FAQ for me, I answered I am Japanese. I enjoyed my special breakfast sitting on the bench at the platform and then in the train. I felt like being a New Yorker! I loved the taste of the bagel and cream cheese very much. I think I'll buy it again when I want something special! I got refreshed and head to the nursing home!
Before lunch, I talked with a social worker. She listened to my story and gave me a good suggestion. I was glad to have her with me.
At lunch time, I sat with a woman who is, I think, really a picky eater. She often doesn't like the meal and asks the kitchen staff to change the plate or special order which is often not included that day's menu, like to replace port to chicken, or to make cheese sandwiches, and so on. Today's regular menu was lasagna. She obviously loved it because she finished it all and asked another plate and finished the one! I said, "I'm glad you like lasagna and had two plate of them!" She smiled at me. To see her eating with joy was really blessing!
In the afternoon, we had a good church service. Beautiful testimonies, songs, and prayers. I was encouraged by people's loves. Unfortunately, we have to cancel next Thursday's service due to a lack of manpower. I could only play music but I can't give a preach...... I feel useless but I hope we can have another wonderful service in August.
And I really hope the new pastor is coming very soon. We, pastoral care staff, are in an unstable situation. We need someone to lead us, a decision maker. Until the pastor comes, we should go on by ourselves, I mean, volunteers.
After getting home, I spent two hours with the piano, practicing a duet song which I am going to sing with my friend at the next workshop, two piano pieces which I am going to play in service at my church in Brooklyn next Sunday. Then I wrote an e-mail to apply for the speech pathology research volunteer next semester, hopefully once a week. I'm not a college student but I am hoping to join it after having an interview with the faculty. I've been interested in language pronunciation since I started to learn English seriously a few years ago, or possibly more years ago, since I started to learn classical singing because I need to sing songs in several different languages. I want to know how alphabetical language speaking people pronounce every consonants or vowels. I can't afford to go to university but I want to learn about it. If I can get this opportunity, I'd be another wonderful experience here!
Tomorrow will be my day off. I'm going to read a book which I borrowed last Saturday, "Musicophilia". This book is fascinating for me! It contains many things I wanted to know! Even though it's difficult for me to read and understand, I want to read it anyway. Books always teach me a lot.
Before lunch, I talked with a social worker. She listened to my story and gave me a good suggestion. I was glad to have her with me.
At lunch time, I sat with a woman who is, I think, really a picky eater. She often doesn't like the meal and asks the kitchen staff to change the plate or special order which is often not included that day's menu, like to replace port to chicken, or to make cheese sandwiches, and so on. Today's regular menu was lasagna. She obviously loved it because she finished it all and asked another plate and finished the one! I said, "I'm glad you like lasagna and had two plate of them!" She smiled at me. To see her eating with joy was really blessing!
In the afternoon, we had a good church service. Beautiful testimonies, songs, and prayers. I was encouraged by people's loves. Unfortunately, we have to cancel next Thursday's service due to a lack of manpower. I could only play music but I can't give a preach...... I feel useless but I hope we can have another wonderful service in August.
And I really hope the new pastor is coming very soon. We, pastoral care staff, are in an unstable situation. We need someone to lead us, a decision maker. Until the pastor comes, we should go on by ourselves, I mean, volunteers.
After getting home, I spent two hours with the piano, practicing a duet song which I am going to sing with my friend at the next workshop, two piano pieces which I am going to play in service at my church in Brooklyn next Sunday. Then I wrote an e-mail to apply for the speech pathology research volunteer next semester, hopefully once a week. I'm not a college student but I am hoping to join it after having an interview with the faculty. I've been interested in language pronunciation since I started to learn English seriously a few years ago, or possibly more years ago, since I started to learn classical singing because I need to sing songs in several different languages. I want to know how alphabetical language speaking people pronounce every consonants or vowels. I can't afford to go to university but I want to learn about it. If I can get this opportunity, I'd be another wonderful experience here!
Tomorrow will be my day off. I'm going to read a book which I borrowed last Saturday, "Musicophilia". This book is fascinating for me! It contains many things I wanted to know! Even though it's difficult for me to read and understand, I want to read it anyway. Books always teach me a lot.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
starting over
This morning, I felt like starting over.
Visited 4th floor people. Greeted people at the day room. They hugged me. Visited a resident's room and spent a good time there chatting. He was discharged from the hospital last week. He seemed weak soon after that. He seemed quite fine today, which made me very happy.
Updated the room chart on the PC at the office, which took me more than 2 hours, in the morning and in the afternoon. Also I made a couple of phone calls, which, I think, made the good-will directions better.
At lunch time, had a good chat with two residents. We talked about skating, skiing, amusement parks, baseball, winer in NY, etc.
After work, I went to my music friend's apartment. She and her husband took me to a Mexican restaurant. We enjoyed food and talk for a while. They talked me that they first met at a folk singing camp 40 years ago! They are a truly good couple. I felt really warm spending time with them. Then she and I practiced our duette for an hour.
I was so sleepy when I got home because I watched the MLB All Star game last night! I took a nap for a while and felt better.
Today, my life turned up a little after a tough time this week. I'm here to talk with people. I should be happy. I should be a happy-go-lucky person!
Visited 4th floor people. Greeted people at the day room. They hugged me. Visited a resident's room and spent a good time there chatting. He was discharged from the hospital last week. He seemed weak soon after that. He seemed quite fine today, which made me very happy.
Updated the room chart on the PC at the office, which took me more than 2 hours, in the morning and in the afternoon. Also I made a couple of phone calls, which, I think, made the good-will directions better.
At lunch time, had a good chat with two residents. We talked about skating, skiing, amusement parks, baseball, winer in NY, etc.
After work, I went to my music friend's apartment. She and her husband took me to a Mexican restaurant. We enjoyed food and talk for a while. They talked me that they first met at a folk singing camp 40 years ago! They are a truly good couple. I felt really warm spending time with them. Then she and I practiced our duette for an hour.
I was so sleepy when I got home because I watched the MLB All Star game last night! I took a nap for a while and felt better.
Today, my life turned up a little after a tough time this week. I'm here to talk with people. I should be happy. I should be a happy-go-lucky person!
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
good-meaning spirits head for different directions
Everybody is a good fellow, has a beautiful spirit. Now, in a situation where there is no moderator, no organizer, and no leader, every spirit heads for different directions. It is such a sad situation. I don't know what to do. I feel useless again. I love everybody and I can't do anything to make the situation better. I just can be there and do anything I can do. I hope the situation turns better and everybody gets together in the end. There must be some misunderstanding and speculations going around. I hope the air is cleared in the end..... I really hope so.
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