Today, when I was in an elevator at the nursing home, going down to the kitchen to submit my lunch order, a staff asked me, "Where is Pastor Ieva?" I said, "She is coming in the afternoon." Then she said, "Ms. XX died. This Monday. Today is funeral at 12. " I was stunned.
On my first day at the nursing home, Ieva and I made the round and took picture of each resident and me. I visited the resident's room. She was unconscious. She seemed so weak. We took a picture but Ieva said, "Naoko, we should come again and take another picture. She has a beautiful smile. She is not like this." I remember Ieva's sad face at that time.
Then time passed. July 23th, Ieva and I visited the hospital to see some of our residents who were hospitalized then. She was one of them. I was quite surprised to see her because she was much better than the last time I saw her. She sat up on the bed and smiled beautifully! Ieva told me that she used to play the piano. After singing several hymns together, I sang a song for her. I thought she understood a classical music. I happened to have a music piece with me, "Rejoice Greatly, O daughter of Zion" from "Messiah" by Handel. She seemed to enjoy it very much. As I sang, she was conducting me, almost dancing, all the time smiling. When I finished singing, she said, "you are a wonderful singer and you are beautiful!" And she said to Ieva, "you are beautiful, too!" Good consideration! And Ieva said, "You ARE beautiful!" to her. And I said, "We three are very beautiful women! Then we burst in to laughter. It was a wonderful time. Filled with happiness, music, good spirits.
This Monday, on the first day I came back from my vacation, Ieva and I were going to visit the hospital again. We were one particular person in our mind who seemed to be in a very serious situation. We thought she was fine. Then we knew the person was back from the hospital. So we canceled the visit and went to the person's room straight.
If we made the trip to the hospital on Monday?...... This question was hanging over my head all day today. She passed away this Monday. I don't know what time. I should have visited her.. ? It's the question we never know the answer, maybe.
Anyway, I am still glad to have a good time with her. Enjoyed music with her.
At the same time, I feel sorry for her that I didn't visit her another time. I hope she is in a better place and is enjoying music with people up there. Thank you for your cheerful spirit, Rose!
I learned I shouldn't postpone my time when I want to do something. When I think I want to meet someone, just meet her or him. When I think I want to start something, just start it. Only if the circumstances permits me to do it..... It's easy to say, but hard to practice.
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